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Coming Soon

Hare Guide


Are you interested in haring for your precious kennel and taking your fellow hashers on a S.H.I.T. show adventure?  Yes!?  Awesome! You’re so hot right now!

…but first, there are a handful of things that you need to know.  It’s important that we hold on to the last shred of respect we have for you, so please review this guide before you go off gallivanting the streets in your hot pants throwing flour everywhere and getting everyone lost.

  1. Planning your trail
    1. Co-hares It’s best to identify your co-hares, in advance.  Trails should be live and unless you are lightning fast, you probably cannot do it all.  Most of your fellow hashers will be happy to assist you.  If it is your first time haring, please get a veteran co-hare to assist you.  Ask mismanagement for help if you need it!
    2. Start/end locations should be within the Tysons-Leesburg- Manassas triangle.  Start must be in an area with adequate parking and generally discreet.  While avoiding authorities is sometimes impossible, some areas attract more scrutiny than others.  NO SCHOOLS for start/end. DO NOT UPSET BREW CREW BY PROVIDING A SHITTY START/END LOCATION (AND I MEAN “SHITTY” IN THE BAD WAY, NOT THE “S.H.I.T” WAY).  Most trails are A-A (start and end are the same place).  If it is not A-A, a bag vehicle must be provided.
    3. Walkers’ and Runners’ trails must be provided.  Both trails should take less than one hour.  Runners trail should be generally around 3-4 miles under good conditions, 2 – 3 miles in mid-heavy shiggy.
    4. Private Property must be avoided unless given explicit permission by the owner of said property.
    5. A Beer Check must be provided for walkers and runners.  Additional shot and/or beer checks can be provided.
    6. Scouting is a requirement.  You must ensure that your trail is not on private property, generally safe to traverse, and that your beer check location is discreet enough that the neighborhood children will not steal it.
  2. Send the following information to your hareraiser, AT LEAST ONE WEEK BEFORE TRAIL
    1. Trail Number (Pornicator/Trail Wrangler will know it if you don't)
    2. Theme (if you have one)
    3. Date of trail
    4. Hares
    5. Start address
    6. Description (explanation of theme, make it funny)
    7. D'erections
    8. OnOnOn (Location and Address)
    9. Notes: ex. bug spray, headlamp, dog friendly factor, stroller friendly factor
  3. Trail time
    1. Money The hares do not pay for trail, but they are not reimbursed for beer/shot checks except for special events such as Tour Duh Hash.  You must provide your own flour/chalk.
    2. Symbols/Marking trail Please use basic SHIT symbols.  If you choose to use unique symbols (ex. Song check), you must let the pack know before hares away.  Please do not use any symbols for double-meanings.  For example, a True Trail Runners should not also be a Bad Trail for the walkers. If you are a newer hare, please focus on not getting people lost rather than being tricky. It is better to over-mark than under-mark.
    3. Hares Away The RA will give the hares an opportunity to inform the pack about trail. Please be prepared to tell them:
      1. How many beer checks?
      2. How many shot checks?
      3. Is there a runners/walkers split and where-ish?
      4. Are there unique symbols on trail that we should know about?
      5. Any additional information that might be helpful to the pack
  4. OnOnOn please be sure location is big enough for the group, stays open late enough for the pack to get food/drink, and it’s nice if you give the location a heads up that we will be coming. It is encouraged for the hares to try and score beer and/or food specials from the establishment, but I’m not sure many places do this anymore and that’s why we need to make America great again.

Markings

Intersections

Three puffs of flour in a triangle

intersection

Bad Trail

Three parallel lines

bad trail

Check Back

A check symbol and a number

check back

Beer Check

The letter "B" in a wth a check to the RIGHT

beercheck

True Trail All

An arrow with three lines through it

true trail

True Trail Runners

The letter "L" with an arrow head

true trail runners

True Trail Walkers

The letter "W" with an arrow head

true trail walkers

Beer Near

The letters "BN"

beer near

Mis-Management


Beer Bitch
Grand Masters
Hash Cash
Pussy Coast Highway
Hash Master
Hashshit Meister
Vaginger Monologues
High Violator
Fingrrrrrrrrrr
Media Slut
DIY and Cry
Pornicator/Trail Wrangler
PUD-JAM Whore
The Whore of Sarajevo
Rediculous Announcer
SWAG Queen